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+The Girl+
+I Am+ |
to every broken hearted.. so there i was, assuming that everything would work out. so thinkgs with 1 went way too far way too fast, and i fear i've lost him. i know i haven't lost him, but then again in a very real sense i have. because alskdfuaosiudf. yeah fuck it. and r was supposed to call tuesday. because of all this bullshit monday night. and how he lied to me so so much. and lead me on. and now i feel like double crap. and as joejoe was leaving he goes "i'm sorry about you and r" because he knew it. he fucking knew it. and i hate that. and i totalled my car and i'm all achey and cranky and i just want to curl up in someone's arms. so i have lost all my freedom and my car and everything. and it makes me want to die. a lot. fuck this game. and now i'm left with no valentine, nothing to fall back on, no prom date, no nothing. i am the unwanted, the unknown. i fucking hate this part. i hadn't thought about anyone else since november, and now i'm left without a real goodbye or even a reason. just lies to hold on to. fuck trust. i don't think i can trust anymore. because every time someone says something, i always wonder if it's just a story they're telling me. so i sit alone, sore and cold, wishing for things i can never ever have. and it sucks. i know i'm just being an angsty teen girl and that everything will work out, but for right now it sucks so much like i don't even know. it just hurts so much because i was led on. and i really thought it was going somewhere. i really thought so. guess i was more fucking wrong then i could ever even begin to believe. and you know what, i don't want to be friends. i want it all. all but i guess by now i've realized i usually don't get what i want. i guess that's good, because that way i'm not a spoiled brat with too much. but still.. just.. fuck it. +The Last Five+ |